Enough to make me...

want to switch occupations. Sebastian is finally here. He made his debut a whole 9 days passed his due date on October 18th at 1741. It was a semi-difficult labor that ended with a last minute c-section since his huge head wouldn't come down any further down the birth canal.

I haven't worked since the end of September and I'm on maternity leave until December. I plan on taking additional time off after a couple weeks of work to help accommodate my troops to take time off during Christmas. With our baby boy finally here, I wish that I was saying that I wasn't going back to work. I've mentioned before that I have changed my main goal in life and will hopefully be able to separate from the military. Boy, do I wish I had pushed the button with this pregnancy.

Having Sebastian here has only confirmed my feelings about being a SAHM or a WAHM. It's funny because if anyone told me in high school or as I was starting out in Air Force that my views would change by the time I hit twenty-five and that I'd want to be a SAHM to take care of my family and household and have a big family (more than two kids), I would say you were crazy. Here I am, twenty-seven years old, and I am content with not working another day-outside of our home. Gone are my desires to retire after 20 years or more in the military, I no longer want to strive to go as far as I can up the ranks, and I wish even more that cost of living in this state was reasonable enough that I didn't have to put the uniform back on and worry about pumping at work.

Alas, I'll enjoy my time off with my son while it lasts. When I go back to work and he has to go to daycare, I will suck it up and put on my uniform and put my 100% into my job while missing him. Hopefully soon, in the not-so-distant future, I'll be able to push the button and just stay at home.

Kind of like a proud momma...

It's been over a month since our last post. Dan's been quite busy with work and his online classes and I've been busy trying to prep my office for when I go on maternity leave and get the house (and ourselves) ready for the baby. I will be 37 weeks tomorrow... holy crap!

In July, I started getting together with my boss to put together a package for one of my airmen. BTZ (below the zone) is a big deal in the Air Force because it recognizes the hard work that a young airman has put forth even though they are so young in the military. If selected, the airmen (must be an E-3) are able to pin on E-4 six month early from when they would normally pin on. That being said, it is a very competitive award since only a few are selected.

A1C Beatty is my second "kid" as a supervisor. He came into the military later in life (at about 24) with enough college credits to put two stripes on his arm as soon as he graduated basic training. He went through a really rough time when he first came to our squadron, but showed determination and will that he was going to make things work and impressed everyone. He has demonstrated that his huge heart and never-give-up attitude can get him through anything the military has thrown at him for the past 2 years he's been in. And I couldn't be any more proud of him, proud of watching him grow each and every day.

Although I still struggle with writing broken English, the leadership in our squadron helped me tremendously when it came to his BTZ package (shout out to SMSgt Phillips and MSgt Leonard!). Of course when they were finished with it, there was no way that the board would deny that A1C Beatty was an outstanding person and Airman.

This past Tuesday, it was announced that he was one of the 9 people in our wing that were awarded a stripe.



A1C Beatty and I at the change of command this past June

I was beyond excited and couldn't help but get a bit teary eyed for him. A1C Beatty came from doubting his ability to adapt in the office to being the #2 in the office. Seriously? There was no way he could be overlooked.

Moments like these make me proud to be a supervisor, NCO in the military and tempt me to stay in....

WOOOOO-saaaahhhhh....

Third trimester is definitely taking a toll on me. I seriously hope that the next one is not as brutal as this one! With Sebastian constantly putting me in a constant state of discomfort and feeling fatigued and short of breath, I find myself wishing that it was October already. I know I'll be thinking differently when the time is finally a few days away, but boy, this kid just loves his space.

Work... is work. My career field recently switched to a new web-based system for the program we primarily use and it's been nothing but a pain. I've had to extend our office hours and mandate weekend work hours to help catch up! :( I hate doing to that to my people, but they all understand we have to do it. The light is getting brighter at the end of the tunnel though because our stacks of backed up paperwork are shrinking and it's looking better and better! I just hope that headquarters can fix the server issues and bugs soon because I'd hate to fall behind again just because the system is too slow.

Right now, my biggest issue with work is the fact that I've felt so uninspired lately. I know that eventually I want to get out because we want to focus on family, but lately I've been thinking, man, I wish I could separate wish this pregnancy... This is no way possible (living in expensive California) and plus I don't think I'm near being done with the Air Force yet. There's still so much I can do/give. BUT- I need inspiration, I need A CHANGE! I am talking ORDERS! The list came out last Wednesday and there are openings for the both of us in England, Germany and Hawaii! I find myself constantly reminding Dan to put those "order vibes" out there in the universe because I desperately want and need orders out of the states and more importantly, out of California!


Sigh, for now, I will continue to focus on getting things ready for this baby and remembering to breathe at work.

I need a bigger plate.

I am the type of person that needs to be busy at work. I do have those days when I would like to just make a mindless task last all day, but I like to remain active at work. Sometimes I think I've got too much initiative at times and a sometimes dangerous work ethic. There are times when I feel that if it was allowed, I would probably install the programs I use at work on my home computer just so I could attempt to get ahead. What?!

On top of my work, I like to get involved. Fundraisers, community service, drives, etc. Dan and I love feeling like we made a difference for the better. We appreciate the military for making it sort of a mandatory requirement that all members must be involved in some volunteer activity no matter how small or large. I just wish more people would get into volunteering because they want to, not because they need to fill a block for their next performance report. I remember doing some volunteer stuff in high school just because it was also a way to hang out with friends. Volunteering can occupy a lot of off time that could be spent at home with family or doing school work.

It's only the first day of the second month of 2010 and I feel as if I've got too much on my plate. Am I in over my head? I'm still learning about my role in my shop and on top of work, I'm trying my best to make sure I look out for my people and take care of them. I also need to take care of me and my career at the same time. Shit, that reminds me that I need to drop off my reenlistment paperwork this week.

This semester, I'm taking two online courses. After these classes are complete, I'll have 2 classes left to obtain my Associate's with the CCAF. Next month, I have my promotion test to study for. Wtf? I know so many SNCOs have advised that I not take any school around testing time, but damn... testing cycle for the next rank is Feb-Mar and a semester at the community college in the area is from Jan through May. I may have shot myself in the foot this time around (which will be my second time testing for the next rank), but I really want to knock out my Associate's and my goal is to finish this year.

I need to find the balance between the assignments I need to knock out and work so that I can just focus on studying for my promotion test. That on top of preparing for a big inspection at work, I feel like I bit off more than I can chew for this quarter. Oh, the inspection is during the week I test next month, did I mention that? Oh crap, and I also need to start thinking about what to do for our daughters 6th birthday. Damnit. The first two weeks of March are so hectic and we just started February.

Anyone have any aspirin? The headache I started out with just grew larger after I read over this post.